Thursday, December 16, 2010


My daughter turns 5 on Saturday. It is Christmas time. And we have so very many things planned. Tomorrow I am taking her to see the Nutcracker, just the two of us. Saturday she is having a Fancy Nancy fashion tea party with her friends. Sunday is a family party. And then just a few days later is Christmas.

We are struggling a bit. I want to be happy, joyous, and enjoy every minute. But she has been the most difficult kid lately. Everything is a issue for her. She's difficult, doesn't listen well, is not very nice to her sister. Today we had to leave a diner because she wasn't behaving. The 2 year old was fine. The about to be 5 year old was loud, not sitting in her seat, and arguing with her sister over the eggs. Honestly, she seems like she has PMS lately. She cries at the drop of the hat. This is the scenario, she is rude and talks back to me. I am stern with her, tell her to stop. Then she cries that "everyone is mean to her". Honestly, I don't know what to do here.

I am looking forward to tomorrow. However, do you know how many times today I said, if you don't stop, we won't go tomorrow. It is exhausting. Please, tell me this is just a phase.

Friday, December 10, 2010


Well hello there. Nice to see you.

I have been so busy. I'm exhausted and the house is messy. But, the christmas tree is up, laundry is done and I have been working a lot.

I just tried to finish my christmas shopping for the kids and Amazon wanted to charge me $45 for shipping. What?!? I'm glad I always read over the invoice carefully before clicking okay. When your child is turning 5 and old enough to get it how do you christmas shop when you have a husband who works all the time? I have four things to get: my first scooter, wagon, bongo drums and a music type toy for Ella. We are going to the mall tomorrow but it's just me and the kids. I'm not sure how to do this!?! I would also like to get them christmas pajamas but it's not imperative.

I've always done all the christmas shopping and this year it's getting to me. I don't wanna do it all myself! Kid gifts, his parents gifts, all of it. Yuck.

Also, I have been working this Stella & Dot jewelry thing. Had 3 trunk shows so far in the past week. And in the next week I have 5 more! It's fun.

I'm pretty happy even though the restaurant isn't as busy as it should be. I love the holidays, christmas trees, christmas lights and Santa. It is so fun to share all this with your kids.

Monday, November 29, 2010

We're in Boston! Without the kids! For 2 whole nights! Whooo - hooo!
It is really fun, this morning we're being lazy. I have no place I have to be. That never happens. I'm looking forward to a fun day!

Friday, November 26, 2010

Another Layer

Wow, I haven't posted in awhile. I had been so good at posting often lately. Last week I hosted a Stella and Dot jewelry trunk show. It was so awesome and the jewelry was so great I decided to become a "stylist". This is a bit crazy, I've always been wary of those sort of things, but I decided to just go for it. It's not like I don't have enough to do. Two kids, running a restaurant, trying to keep up with hobbies, housecleaning etc. But, I decided that I thought it was fun and a great product. And that I would just go for it.
So, I'm trying to book trunk shows now, which is why I haven't been blogging. I've spent my time picking out jewelry for my starter kit, making lists of who I think would have a trunk show, and calling, emailing them. Oh, and I've been doing my online training. which is optional, but suggested to make the most money out of this. Which, of course, is what I want. Can I do it all? Restaurant, kids, mom, housekeeper, cook and jewelry salesperson. I have no idea. But who knows? Maybe I can.
If anyone likes jewelry and is interested check it out, I was really impressed with the quality.

Friday, November 19, 2010


More on Friday:
I still have a headache.

I have not showered, I think that playdate is getting cancelled.

My babysitter just cancelled for tonight.

Just noticed pen marks on my ottoman.

But, more importantly, for xmas should I get these or these?

And I found my daughters birthday present, I will take her to see the nutcracker at a local theatre and get her this shirt;


Last night I had a very needed Girls Night Out. 6 of us had dinner and drinks. It really is amazing how much only 2 1/2 hours can do for your soul. I went to bed happy and relaxed.

My little girls got their hair cut and they look so adorable I am dying to take their picture. My camera has been at work for a week and I can't for the life of me remember to get it when I am there.

Today is so busy. It is my one day of the week that my husband gets up with the kids. Of course, they slept until 8. I know this shouldn't bother me, it does a little. I went back to sleep, although I have a lot of trouble getting back to sleep in the morning. I woke at 9:30 with a raging headache. It's bad, and my 2 year old has turned into a screecher, which is not good at all for headaches. Husband ran off to work the moment I opened my eyes. My brother in law is visiting tonight. I have to clean the house, do payroll for work, go to work, supposedly have a quick playdate at 1:30, music class at 4, a potluck from 5 to 6 and then work at 6. Wow, I'm tired just writing that. The kids are screaming and screeching and arguing over a little tiny container with marbles in it. I'm not sure how it's possible that my days when I "sleep in" and are supposedly to be less stressful tend to get more crazy.

There's a positive here. I made chocolate chip cookies last night and I am going to go have one right now. There's crying coming from the playroom, however I'm just picturing that cookie. (I can tell it's not I'm hurt crying, just I'm fighting with my sister crying).

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Holiday Blues

I'm getting a little bummed about the holidays and how much money every costs. There are so many pretty things and so little money. I know I am not in a dire situation and we will have a fine holiday season. My kids have lots and don't need more stuff. But sometimes I get that picture in my head of the tree with present piled high and part of me wants to do that for my kids. And part of me knows it's ridiculous and they shouldn't be getting stuff just to get stuff. When I see pictures like this, I can't help it, I want it. I've always loved beautiful clothes and to see my girls on Christmas in matching dresses like this? I would die of the cuteness. I love them! Also, I look at the pricetag and how in the world did a catalog arrive in my mailbox where a dress, for a child, costs $198?!?! It is insane. so pretty, yet so insane. Somehow my brain equally believes both is true.

My children will not have matching beautiful dresses for the holidays. We don't need them. They have lots of clothes. The money. They will have christmas movies, christmas songs, ornaments, lights and a tree. This will have to be enough, even though Chasing Fireflies is trying to tell me that it isn't.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Details Details...

I thought I would give some more details on my small but motivated list.

I have always wanted to learn French, I always thought it was such a romantic language. When I lived in NYC I was supposed to take French lessons, and then it turned out it didn't start until the end of my pregnancy, so I just never did it.

To run in a marathon - I am not a runner, I have run, but am definitely not a runner. Currently I feel like I'm in the worst shape. My jeans are feeling a little snug and I just feel yuck. I seriously need to get off my ass and do something. How do people with young kids find the time? When my kids were babies I was fine, I would exercise with them, strap them on me and I would go. Right now I'm in a rut.

Oh, how I want to play the guitar. Have I mentioned this before? Because my four year old also wants to play the guitar. So, guess who is taking lessons? Yes, the 4 year old. My hope is she will teach me. (I do listen in on their lessons and go home and practice)

To move somewhere, San Francisco, Portland, or someplace abroad. - I have a lot of regret with this one. About a year after college Tim and I were going to move to Portland, Oregon. We did research, we looked for jobs, we looked for apartments. Then I spoke to my mother about it. Basically I feel like I was a big baby because I couldn't do it. My mother said, you can't go that far. And I actually listened. Who does that? I am a classic first born, I have (almost always) listened to my parents. I need to remind myself when my kids are that age that I should let them have experiences and not be afraid to lose them. Currently Samantha thinks I should go to college with her, so we might not have this issue. It's never too late, right? Maybe we could move somewhere when the kids are older, although that seems so far away...

to be crafty - working on it. Going decently well. Knitting is good, birthday party plans coming up next month, I plan to be quite crafty for her Fancy Nancy party I have in the works.

to foster a child. - Although I want to do this, I honestly have no idea if it will happen. Maybe later on in life when my kids are more grown. Right now my husband does not want more kids, while I do, but not for awhile yet. I'm still fairly confident I can convince him but alas, this is for another, more serious post, the whether or not to extend your family post.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Things I Want...

Here is a list of some things I always wanted to do. As I get older I'm trying to think about accomplishing some. Others I might never accomplish. I'll probably be adding to it also.

to learn to sew and make some clothes.

to be crafty and have lots of projects going on.

to learn French.

to complete a marathon.

to play the guitar.

to not worry so much (about money specifically).

to move somewhere, San Francisco, Portland, or someplace abroad.

to be more organized.

to foster a child.

Saturday, November 13, 2010


I’m a big fan of Christmas. Most specifically I’m a big fan of Christmas cards and Christmas trees. I guess I should be politically correct and say holiday cards. My usual MO is to pick out Christmas cards early. I scrutinize over what photos to pick. I’ve been known to stage elaborate photo shoots since my first child was barely 1 year old. Hundreds of photos to scour through. My husband is not a fan of this process. We probably argue over it yearly, the fact that he does not care what kind of Christmas card we send. How is that even possible? However, he swears that it is true. I can do whatever I want. One year I should test him and get a sample of some crazy Christmas card and see what he says.

I know what I want in a Christmas card. I want my kids to look adorable (obviously). I prefer the cards with 3 pictures. One of each of my children and one of them together. This year, I might branch out and get one in there of all 4 of us, if I can get the hubby to agree. We do not have many pictures of all 4 of us, he works way too much for that. It’s likely to get this I would have to have him in his chef coat at work, with the rest of us smiling festivally around him. I have also been known to order Christmas cards and have half of them sit on my desk never sent. I’m sorry if you were meant to get one last year and didn’t.

Two years ago we used Shutterfly. I loved that picture. I can’t for the life of me remember what last years card was. We had just opened a restaurant and I don’t even know if I did one. Anyway, my

My favorite part about shutterfly is that you can adjust the pictures so much to see exactly what you’re getting. I love popping tons of pics into those little boxes to see what they will look like. I also like that you can check several items off your gift giving list. Grandparents love calendars and mugs with pics of the kids. It is so easy and they are so happy. Every year we give each set of grandparents a calendar.

For holiday cards this year, I like the simplicity of this one.

and the amount of pictures you can get with this one.

But I think my favorite is this beauty right here. I like the amount of pictures, the monogram and I love the saying. "And I Think To Myself what a wonderful World". If you can't feel that way during the holidays then when can you?

Shutterfly is offering bloggers 50 free holiday cards. Learn more about it here.

Shutterfly will be providing me with 50 free cards for writing this post, but the thoughts are all my own. Well, I’m off to go get some good pictures of the kids for my cards!

Oh, and by the way, has any seen CVS, they have a full Christmas decorations out since the day after Halloween, that's just not right. Now my daughter is yelling about how she wants Barbie ornaments every time we go in there. Frustrating....

Friday, November 12, 2010

What I Wore

I need to try harder with my pics. This weekend I will try to get a good one of what I wear to work. This week I wore, my favorite flannel shirt. I love this shirt, it's my go to, wear twice a week shirt. I can't remember where it's from, but I wore it with a alternative black t and hudson jeans and frye boots.

The other pic is a tracey reese frock dress, bamboo black tights and Seychelle shoes. (Need a better pic of this outfit bc it was a good one, I had on a fitted camel J Crew blazer with it when I was outdoors). Samantha, the cuter one in the pic is wearing gap kids and her brand new haircut. American Girl doll on floor, we are unsure what she's wearing, vintage we think.

Don't Stand So Close To Me

My children love me. That is known. Especially the little one. She must be touching me almost all the time. Just this morning, in my bed, she had to have one little arm above me and another below me. Like if I was 10 times smaller she would be holding me like a baby. It was not comfortable. It was my one morning to sleep in and she had to be in bed with me, holding me. Lately at times it gets to me. I try not to let it. Sometimes I feel like screaming , stop touching me'. I know, it's terrible to think that. And I don't scream it. Sometimes it gets to be so much. I'm cooking dinner and she's on my legs, begging me to pick her up. How do I get her to be a little more independent, or at least a little less touchy feely?

For today, I will focus on the times when I pick her up after not being with her and she has a huge smile on her face, and yells mommy, while running to get to me as fast as possible. She then throws herself around me, even if we were only separated for one hour. She loves me, and I love her too, more than I can imagine.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

As always, my life is feeling like a whirlwind. The days pass so quickly, so much seems to get done and not get done. And, I am exhausted.

Knitting is going well, I'm almost done with my second scarf. It is taking longer that I thought and I decided to make a hat next. I'm a little nervous about the circular knitting so someone suggested I crochet. It seems complicated, but probably just because I'm used to knitting. So, I'll get there. I just have this lovely vision of the 4 of us wearing hats I made. Believe it or not, this seems like a very impressive feat.

I used to take Samantha to a weekly playgroup where for the first hour everyone played and for the second hour people watched the kids for you while you sit in a group setting with a counselor. It is at times very cheesy and wierd but sometimes it was great. When I was potty training Samantha it was great to talk about my frustrations or hear tips from other people. Sometimes the group facilitator, who I guess is a licensed "life coach", can you be a licensed life coach, I'm not sure?, can be quirky. When nobody has a big issue to discuss she will make us go around the room and say what is wonderful about us. I've done this so many times in the last 4 years that I'm so over it and can't help rolling my eyes like a teenager when she brings it up. That will lead her to say, "and why does this make you so uncomfortable..."

Anyway, I'm not painting a pretty picture. It is a great place to go because you have something to do, you know at least a few of your friends will be there, and it can be fun. I went this week with just Ella for the first time in about 6 months. It was actually nice, we did have to say what was wonderful, but I'm so used to that by now, it's no big deal. I said it was wonderful that I go to a organized exercise class once a week because I'm taking time for me, even if that is all I do some weeks, at least I know I'm doing something. I also told them I started a blog. Only 2 people know about my blog in real life (husband and 1 friend). It was like I was sharing a little secret about myself. It was fun, and they all thought it was a great idea. They all might be googling me now, if they care that much. Number 1, I don't think I'm easily traceable and Number 2, my secrets aren't all that juicy that I need to hide them. I just do like knowing that family and all friends aren't reading my blog. What about you? Does everyone know about your blog? My old blog, I used to email out to remind people to read every so often, so all my friends and family read it. For this point in my life, I prefer it this way.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Someone Else's Giveaway

I want to win a coat from Beth at I Should Be Folding Laundry and you probably do too. Go here to see her post.

She is giving away a awesome Lands End coat for kids. It looks very warm and cozy. If I won, I would pick pink because my daughter will only wear pink if she can help it. what about you?

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

1 Year!

We had our one year anniversary last week. We have owned a restaurant for one year! That seems like a pretty good success, right? Things are not perfect by any means. But, the first 2 years of owning a restaurant are the hardest and at 1 year, we are doing well. That seems like something to be proud of.

We had a party for our staff last Sunday. It was so so great. Many of us are pretty good friends. Of course, we're the bosses (my husband and I). So besides our manager (who we met in college) and my brother, there is a line there. Some we're closer with than others, as always. I had visions of our party being a bonding experience.

We invited everyone to our home. We had it catered, for once we were not cooking. Most of the people who worked for us were there. We have 2 teenagers who work for us, a 20 year old and a mix of people in there 20's and early 30's. So it was interested to have everyone over together to hang out. I was given a copy of this karaoke singstar game. I asked the 16 year old who works for me to bring his playstation over (how hilarious is that?). I wasn't sure how it was going to go down. I said, we're going to karaoke, haha. Everyone laughed and said, yeah, right. Well, we broke out the game and it was perfect. Everyone sang, the good, the bad, the younger, the older. It was hilarious. We laughed. The only people who didn't sing were the 16 year old who brought his playstation over and the Mexican cook who can't read much English. I would love to know what was going through their heads. They were both smiling, laughing and just watching from the back.

I like to think we bonded, we definitely had fun. Some of us were very good singers, I was one of the worst. But it didn't matter. My song came on. "Every Rose Has It's Thorn" And I rocked it anyway. Fun times.

Now I'm off to make my Christmas lists.

Friday, November 5, 2010

What I Wore...

... To Work Tonight
I've been reading Girls Gone Child who is asking people to post what they wore. I am pretty bad at taking pictures of myself, but it was my first time. I also need another room of the house. Obviously, I took these pics in my playroom.
I am wearing:
dress: Papillon Blanc
tights: Express
purple watch: unknown
boots: Vintage Fryes from 1970's

These are my favorite boots. I forgot to wear the bracelets I wanted to wear with this, next time...
by the way, omg, who doesn't clean up before taking pics that they put on the internet. I apologize. In my defense, I had just gotten off work and I am exhausted, I just really wanted to get this post up. Next time, clean room, I promise.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

More Parenting Woes

Sometimes my about to be 5 year old can be just so annoying to her younger sister. This is especially happening at bedtime. Both Samantha and I read to Ella together, then we sing to her. Then we kiss her good night. Lately Samantha can be so annoying at that time. She will be pulling on the book from her sister. Saying the words ahead of time. Tonight she kept putting her foot on the book. It's like she's doing it just to be annoying and difficult. I feel badly for being a little tough on her. But, this is supposed to be a nice, quiet wind down time and Samantha can make it so difficult. It's amazing that someone can be so sweet sometimes and just so terrible other times with her sister. I guess that is sisterhood.

An update on Ella's bedtime. Tonight I have walked her back to bed 3 times so far. Last night she woke up and we let her in out bed. Today someone suggested a gate in the doorway and just tell her she has to stay in her room. This seems a little harsh to me for someone her age. Tim agrees and thinks that is not a option for us. I guess I'm just hoping she will grow out of it.

This morning I told Samantha she should put on her tights herself (I was in the shower at the time). She looked at me and said, "you're a bad mom." So many thoughts went through my
head at that moment, I wasn't sure what to say.
Number 1, she has no idea what a bad mom is.
Number 2, I think she might be a tough teenager.
Number 3, many ways I could go here.

I decided to tell her that I was not, in fact a bad mom. That really hurts my feelings to have her say that. Bad moms don't feed, clothe, or take their children to school. She just looked at me and said, okay, you're a good mommy.

Lately a lot I feel on the brink of being too harsh with her. I just feel like she is at this critical age where lessons need to be taught. She'll either learn or become a big brat. She needs to know what is appropriate to say to people, and as her mother I should be teaching her. Right?

I'm not sure if I've mentioned it here yet but Tim and I are going away for 2 nights at the end of the month, this is seriously needed. We went away for a very short one night last February, left at night and returned at 8 AM the next day. Before that, it had been before Ella was born. So, this is needed, maybe I'll have more patience afterwards. I can just keep picturing those 2 nights when I start to get frustrated.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Bedtime Woes

I woke up a few night ago and felt something warm and cuddly next to me. I instinctively curled up next to her. Then I awoke. "Tim?", I whispered. "Did you go get Ella?"
"No, did you?" "Nope."
My just turned 2 year old and just started sleeping in her own bed, was now coming to my bed in the middle of the night.
Samantha will be five next month, she still yells for us when she wakes. She does not get out of bed on her own. My little baby Ella is getting out of bed on her own. What's even more strange to me is that she's not even waking me at all. Just climbing into bed and going to sleep.

I have mixed feelings on this. On one hand, she is very cute and cuddly and I don't mind sleeping with her at all. I mind it even less when she's not even waking me up to do it. So sweet... But.... I don't want my kid to sleep with me nightly. That's never really been my thing. I like my space at night. So, what to do? Wait it out? Put her back in the crib? She's too old to let cry at night. I'm not sure. I guess for now we wait.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

I need to post, I know. For now I will give you the obligatory Halloween picture. enjoy!

Thursday, October 28, 2010

A Long Week

wow, cannot believe it's Thursday already. Usually don't like Thursdays because the weekend is close. The weekends are so busy for me. They are my real work week. My week is usually filled with busy activities. I am home alone with the kids, but kind of like it. I get to watch my shows, blog, do whatever want after I get those sweet children off to bed at a reasonable hour. Usually one night I let Samantha stay up a little bit late to watch something special with me. Then this week came. My inlaws were visiting which was very helpful. I went to the grocery store alone, I went to CVS alone, and I drove to pick up my CSA alone. It was heavenly. But also, my computer is in my living room. I didn't blog, I haven't even logged into google reader since Sunday. Glee was not watched. This week was doubly bad because Life Unexpected was a repeat and still don't have Fox due to stupid Cablevision stuff.

But I am excited for this weekend! Halloween fun! We have lots of things to do and hopefully it all goes off wonderfully without problems. Tomorrow Samantha goes trick or treating with school, Sat has soccer and Halloween parties. And Sunday has the same. I'm excited to have fun with the girls.

A very cute interaction with my daughter this morning. We were driving behind a school bus. "Mom, when do I get to take the bus?",
I reply, "Maybe when you're in Kindergarten, next year."
Sam, "I don't see any car seats on that bus"
"You don't use a car seat on a bus".
"Well, maybe you should drive me then."
"Sure, I'd love to drive you if that's what you want, the bus is safe though".
"Well, maybe when I'm a teenager I won't need a car seat and can take the bus".
"Yes, that's a accurate statement."

Samantha is obsessed with teenagers, she cannot wait to be one. The other day she asked me if when she's in high school she can sing in the hallways like the kids in Glee.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

New Hobby

This weekend my parents took the kids at 1 pm. I didn't have to be at work until 5:30. The possibilities were endless. My favorite thing to do with some free time is to see a movie alone but, this weekend nothing was playing at that time. So instead I went to the local knitting store. I learned how to knit about 10 years ago but never actually made anything. I would knit for no reason and then unravel and start again. I probably only did this for about a month. Well, I bought some new needles and a beautiful chunky wool/mohair blend blue yarn. The first couple tries I just wasn't remembering right and wound up pulling it out. Then today I googled it and reviewed "how to knit". Now I am proud to say I have quite a good looking scarf going on. I did it for about a hour today and am now going to knit after hitting publish. Yay! I secretly hope I will love this and can make a couple things as Christmas gifts. But I don't want to put too much pressure on myself. I just love the idea of giving people things I made.

In other news, I'm pretty excited about this busy week I have ahead. Tomorrow I'm driving an hour away to babysit my nephew while my sister goes to have her level 2 ultrasound and will find out what she's having. The next day my in laws are visiting for a few days. Then Friday Samantha goes trick or treating with pre school. And then Halloween over the weekend. I'm super excited for Halloween this year (with the kids). I hope we all enjoy it as much as I'm hoping. There's also a big Halloween party at a wine bar across the street for our restaurant this Saturday night. Even though everyone I know is planning on going I am not. There's three reasons:
1 - I do not like to dress up for Halloween, it's too much pressure.
2 - They're playing techno music I heard, and I hate techno. Just give me some good 80's and 90's hits you can dance to and I'm so happy.
3 - I have a babysitter for work that night. Paying for a babysitter for work and then to go out is just too pricey.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

And Then...

Another day gone by. Kids went to daycare / "school". I went to work. Had to file a workmans comp claim, don't know why this stressed me out so much but it did. Bills paid, blah blah blah.

Came home and made yet another soup. Not nearly as good as yesterdays soup. Cleaned up the kitchen (already!), it's only 7 pm. Got a little annoyed at kids.

Do your kids take care of their toys? This is driving me crazy, especially with birthdays and christmas looming. Each girl has these cardboard suitcases from Land of Nod. They're in a set of three. They were supposed to look cute stacked on their dressers, which is where we put them every night. The girls have been shoving toys in them, playing with them and now 2 out of the 6 are ruined. This bugs me. I just don't know how to teach them to value what they have. I explained to my oldest that I spent money on those suitcases on them. Now they can't use them anymore. I'm just not sure how to get through to them on this. I told Samantha that we need to value and take care of what we have. They cost money and people give us things because they want us to have them. Samantha said "well I take care of Corsey". Corsey is her stuffed dog she's had since she was 2 and slept with every night. Forgive me, but all I could think was, 'yeah, peeing on him 10 times in his life is really taking good care of him. I'm sure he loves that'. It was just funny to me to think of it like that.

Well, I must go because I now have screaming children fighting over some toy that they're not taking care of. Ella has really started to enjoy tantruming, by the way. I have to give baths, do laundry... And then Samantha and I will start the Kit book tonight at bedtime. Lately we've been reading chapter books together and it really is enjoyable to see how the story continues each night.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Thank God It's Over

It was a rough day. There were moments I thought I would not get through it. I had a migraine and nobody to help me. My husband did let me take a 1/2 hr. nap before he went to work. I had already been up about 4 hours, but anyway, it was nice. I would have rather slept in, but I guess I shouldn't complain.

The kids were driving me bonkers. Ella has become a screecher. I used to listen to other people kids and think, "Thank God my daughter doesn't screech because it is the most awful sound in the world." Well, guess what? I'm the lucky one. I have no idea how to get a just turned 2 year old how to not do this.

Even though my day was awful I decided to make some soup. 2 soups in fact. So I feel somewhat accomplished. More on soup details another time. It is now 9 pm. I have 2 sleeping children, a clean kitchen, hamper empty and laundry being done and glass of wine in hand. Now the question is, do I log into google reader and catch up on some blogs? Or do I fold the pile of laundry next to me? I would say I should go for the google reader. But my husband would be oh so impressed if he actually got to get clothes from his closet instead of from a crumpled pile in the laundry basket. Maybe I should try to impress him? I can fold the clothes, I don't think I can go so far as to fold socks. That just doesn't happen here unless I'm having a spectacular day.

In other news, I did bring the toilet paper in from the car and the bathrooms are stocked. I'd say I had a pretty accomplished day even with the headache and missed pilates class.

Oh, and this is Samantha when I told her to get ready for bed. She doesn't like the matching pajamas. Nice look, right? I love the long sleeves under the short for bedtime. Tres chic!


I have got to get better about exercising. Since March I have been going to pilates once a week and have done other things on my own, usually. I've been eating okay.

Lately I've slacked. The past 3 weeks I've missed pilates! Just this morning I was finally going to go. But I had a raging headache and the kids weren't feeling great. I was going to go anyway, power through it. But then the kids freaked out when I went to leave. The headache paired with the yelling made me just give in and stay. Maybe I should have just ran out of there. But honestly, I don't think I could have exercised anyway. So, three weeks without going. Yuck.

I've been feeling sort of awful lately. Too much snacking and not enough exercising. I think I've gained a few. The main reason I'm writing this because I feel it holds me a little bit more accountable to try and exercise and eat better. So here we go. I'm not promising to exercise every day or not eat anything bad. However, I am just promising to be better. We'll see how it goes.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

An Unfortunate Turn of Events

I was not feeling well today. I was worried that I am coming down with something. I'm tired, my throat hurts and I just feel icky. I fed the kids early. Then at about 5:30 I put on Cinderella and we all sat down on the couch to watch it. I was so tired, I just needed a break from the busy day. I figured we could watch a movie and then do bathtime and all that. Then I woke up at 7 and Samantha was sleeping too. This is going to totally f$*k up my night. Things couldn't be much worse. I don't feel great and now my almost 5 year old took an hour nap from 6 to 7 (this is my guess at least). I woke her up. I was drilling her, " Samantha what was the last part of the movie you saw?" "Did you see the ball?" "This is very important you must remember". She didn't remember. I guess it doesn't matter. Either way I'm pretty much screwed. Let's just hope that she will be happy with snuggling in bed with mommy tonight.

Note to self: Moms don't get to not feel well. Moms don't get to get breaks. Next time I think things will work in my favor and I need a break, wait it out, power through it. Your break is when the kids are sleeping (at bedtime, not at 6 pm).

Wish me luck tonight.

And on a unrelated note:
We have three bathrooms in our house. I've had toilet paper in the back of my car for 2 days now. We are currently sharing one roll between 3 bathrooms because I have not walked to the car to get the toilet paper. But it's cold out and I have 2 kids. And whenever I do leave the car I have many other things in my hand. Things more important than toilet paper, apparently. I don't think my husband has noticed this yet. I'm sure he'd have something to say if he did.

And, oh yeah, it's my 100th post!

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Christmas Time

I cannot believe I am already thinking about the holidays. But, I went to Target and they had a Christmas section! And I went to the mall and Hallmark had all the ornaments out. What is going on? Why does it seem like it gets earlier and earlier every year? Do we need 2 1/2 months to get ready for xmas?
I am struggling this year with how to handle the holidays. Samantha is getting older, old enough to really know the traditions. I feel this is the year we have to really be thinking about what our traditions are as a family. I have two issues going on with Christmas.
Number 1 is Santa. I want my child to appreciate christmas time for the beautiful time that it is. The christmas lights, singing, visiting Santa. I don't want to hear about "wants, wants, wants" all the time. I want her to know it's a giving season. We're struggling in two ways with this one. First, I had the idea that from her piggy bank she will buy something for someone who doesn't have and donate it. I suggested Toys for Tots. Tim (husband) thinks that is a foreign concept, putting a toy in a box for someone we don't know. How can I make it more personal? Does anyone have advice for this?
My other issues is Santa. Do you put a number on the amount of gifts you bring? I don't want to give too many. However, we spend time with family and they go crazy. So what does that say when your kid gets 4 presents and their cousins get 20?

Samantha's birthday is also the week before christmas, so it can get out of control. Already at Target this week Samantha is asking for a million things. It's hard to teach gratitude, I guess I will try to show gratitude in my life.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Heavy Stuff

Your children are perfect. My children are perfect. They’re all these perfect little beings.

As parents we want our kids to be perfect. We want the best for them.

Ella is having some minor speech problems. Nothing serious at all. She’s a little delayed. I took her to be evaluated and they said to wait a few months. They think she is fine and will catch up on her own. They think it’s normal for someone with a very talkative older sister to not need to talk. She was napping today. We both fell asleep on my bed. I woke up after 15 minutes and just looked at her. I watched her and thought about how we want the best for our kids. We want them to have a better life than we do.

This exact instance is no big deal. Her small speech delays are not anything serious. But it made me think about how someday there will be something that is not perfect with our kids. What will it be like to deal with that?

When I was 12 I was diagnosed with a medical issue that requires me to take medication for the rest of my life. I was thinking of how my parents felt about that. I know it was somehow hard for them to deal with the fact that I was not perfect. I wonder what challenges I will face as a parent. Whether it will be medical issues, social issues, or my child get arrested or into other trouble. I wonder what these moments will be like.

I hope that I will be able to accept my children for who they are at all times. I know I would with the big things, sexual orientation for example. No matter what sexual orientation my child was I would fully accept them. What about the “little” things? Arrests, drug use? How will we face these challenges as a parent and still accept who they are? Accept their right to make mistakes and learn from them? I guess we just hope that we bring them up well enough that they know right from wrong. Whatever mistakes they make are a part of their lives and something they can learn and grow from. And I will be with them every step of the way.

As long as my children know that I am there for them in life in every way and that I influence their lives in a positive way I will know that I did a good job. The teenage years might be tough. Looking at that sweet face today it’s hard to imagine. I guess we just do the best we can. It’s all we can do, right?

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Things that Are Great...

Greys Anatomy and Private Practice are on tonight.

My kitchen is clean.

New hats and mittens.

Discussing Christmas lists with your four year old (already?!).

Frye boots.

Taking a child to the doctor alone.

Hugs from a happy two year old.


Making veggies from the CSA.

Date night.

Jumping in leaves with the kids.

Knowing that the little things are what matter most.

Things that Suck...

I just found out Flash Forward was cancelled. I really liked that show. I probably should have realized it by now. But it just occurred to me to google it.

I somehow forgot to put Samantha in a pull up last night. We bought new bedding last night at Target, which is now all full of urine. At least she slept through the night and didn't wake me up until 6:30 with this information.

I was up last night not feeling well, I think I'm on the verge of a full blown UTI. Yuck. Also, I hate cranberry juice.

I keep meaning to write a fashion post, but it hasn't happenned yet. I am not ready for winter yet. It is cold here! I have trouble looking great while staying warm. It's hard to dress for the cold weather. I just want to wear a sweatshirt.

I went to Target last night and spent a obscene amount of money there. We don't have a ton of money and I'm not proud of it. I went because we all needed winter comforters for our beds. It is freezing here already. 1 queen comforter, 2 twin comforters and a bunch of other essentials I needed. Soccer ball, fleece pajamas, a few groceries, boots for Samantha. Grand total: $325.

My dog ate the bag of kit kats we got at Target that we didn't even open yet.

I lost a prescription bottle last night and "the man" who was mowing the lawn just found it in the grass. I'm glad it was found but pretty embarrassing that you had medication in your lawn. That's good parenting. I swear, it had a child safety cap on it. That's something, right?

I will try to write a things that don't suck list later on. I'm working on my gratitude right now. Off to clean the house...

Tuesday, October 12, 2010


I'm under the impression that most people thought it was really hard when they had they're first baby. I wasn't like that. I thought the first one was relatively easy. I was always really comfortable around babies and when I had Samantha, the adjustment wasn't that difficult for me. First of all, she was a great baby, she slept through the night at 12 weeks. We lived in New York City at the time. I could easily bring her anywhere with me. Put her in the sling and we went shopping, to restaurants, you name it and it was pretty easy to go with her.

For some crazy reason, I thought because I did it once, that the second would be no big deal. Not the case, for me at least. The transition from 1 to 2 kids was really hard for me. Add to it that we had just opened a restaurant and my husband worked about 70 hours a week and it was more than hard. I wish someone had me take two kids shopping before I decided to have a second. I think that should be a rule. There should be a class. How to get two kids to sleep without them waking each other up... How to do laundry while breastfeeding a baby ... How to cook dinner with two kids ...

A little story for you:
A few days after I had Ella it was my birthday. For some insane reason, I decided to cook dinner because my sister was coming over. My husband, of course, was at work. Samantha was 2 1/2 and had major regressions with potty training at the end of my pregnancy. There I was, cooking dinner, trying to make sure Sam didn't have accidents and nursing my 5 day old baby. My sister walks in. Samantha has to go potty. Next thing I know Samantha has locked herself in the bathroom, while I'm nursing and cooking dinner. I'm pretty sure I started crying. Thankfully, my brother in law came and got her out. I don't think I could even of handled doing that in the given situation. So, as that being one of my first experiences with 2 children, it was a bit of a rocky start.

The two of them are just so different. Ella nursed every 2 hours (during the nighttime) until she was 8 months old. That is about the time when she decided to sleep through the night. Samantha was such a easy baby and didn't get difficult until 2 (right when I had a second child). Ella walked at 11 months, Samantha at 15. Ella is just now talking (and not yet full sentences). Samantha was talking at the age of 12 months and full sentences by 18 months. It's amazing that they both came from the same people (this I'm sure of) and yet they're so different. We think we are parenting them the same way, yet they are not reacting to this parenting in the same way. Ella is a tester, she's not a great listener and it is hell to get her to stay on a time out. I don't think we had ever even put Samantha on a time out by this age. I don't know, it sure will be interesting to see them as teenagers.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Weekend Madness

Well, we're in the middle of the crazy weekend. Worked last night. Today soccer practice, farmers market, lunch. Then I rush home to try and clean this crazy house for the babysitter tonight. Is it wierd that I am worrying about a 17 year old judging me?

What if she tells her mom my house is messy?

What if she tells her mom I served pasta to my kids even though I had no parmesean cheese?

Or what about the time I ran out of pull ups. The babysitter called me at work. I said, oh just put a diaper on my 4 year old, or just put her to bed in undies and I'll deal with it when I get home.

Do you think she tells people about these things?

We'll never know, I hope. I hope it's one of those things that we never do find out the answer to. In the mean time I'll just do a subpar job of cleaning the house for her.

I am excited about the rest of the weekend. We have 70 reservations tonight, which is on the high side of normal for a Saturday night. Although I'm happy when we're busy, I always get a little bit of anxiety worrying that everything will go smoothly. It usually does, so I shouldn't worry.

And tomorrow we have a really cool harvest party that we're hosting along with a local farm. There will be a swing farm and awesome local food, cooked my my husband. It should be a good time.

Well, have a good weekend everyone. I hope I find the time to enjoy mine.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Boots Are Made For Walking

My favorite thing once the weather starts to shift is that I get to start wearing my boots. I am quite find of almost all my boots. My favorite are my Fryes. I have 4 pairs and I love 3 of three of them deeply, the 4th, was my first Frye purchase. I wish I could say I loved them the most because they're the oldest but I just don't love them like I used to.

Frye # 1 - The Harness Boot
Bought 3 years ago. My first big purchase in a boutique clothing store near my house. It was the week after XMas. I had gotten money for XMas and they were in my size. I went and tried them on. They were on sale for $150. A lot of money for me. I couldn't believe I was thinking of spending this on shoes (my feelings on this has changed slightly over the years). I didn't buy them that day, or the time after that. Finally, I brought my husband and tried them on. He said I should go for it. He believes in spending money on quality products and he definitely believes in spending money on shoes. So I got them and wore them almost daily that whole first winter season. They are a beautiful dark chocolate brown. I still wear them, just not as much as I should.

Pair #2 - The Suede Campus with Shearling Interior
I got these 1 1/2 years ago. I love love love them. They are sort of like Uggs b/c of the shearling interior. When I first got them I wore them every day. They were like slippers, I wore them inside the house until bedtime. I did not want to take them off. Unfortunetely, I didn't put enough protection on them and they are a little beat up. They still look and feel great, they're just a little worn in for a suede boot. Oh well, I still wear them, over jeans, with skirts, dresses and leggings. On the first cold day of the year, these are my favorite thing to break out.

Pair #3 - The Vintage Cowboy Frye
These my friend (the owner of the boutique store, is now my friend) found in NY and they were in my size. I'm not sure what that says that I became friends with the store owner. Perhaps, I shop too much? I hope not. I try not to, but I do have to dress up for work and there's not many options around here. Anyway, I digress. These are lovely and my current favorite. I love the heel for a everyday look. They're pretty perfect. Oh, they're great broken in tan with a stripe down the side.

Pair #4 - The Birthday Splurge / Not Yet Worn
The fourth pair is a beautiful bordeaux color. I just got them for my birthday. I actually haven't worn them yet! They are a fancier boot than my others and have a higher heel. I envision wearing them to parties and to work. I have to see how the heel goes with wearing them for 8 hours on my feet.

Anyway, I highly recommend Fryes. Yes, they're pricey. Some of them are way pricey, the most I've spent is on my newest pair and they were $275. I can't let myself spend more than that, it's my limit. And I know I won't get another pair until next year. These are my boots for the year. They're comfortable and look great. Since getting into the Frye addiction I don't wear my old boots anymore. I no longer go near my Uggs, the shearling Fryes are just too perfect. My only issue is that I have no great black boots. Brown, chocolate, just look so beautiful to me. The black boots never look as pretty. I have one old pair from Nine West, I think, that I wear if I really need to wear black.

The one pic is all the fryes, then the other one is some of the other boots I have. The winter boots are my favorite. They are so warm and I feel like they are sort of stylish. Then there's the Uggs and the 2 black boots that I'm not totally fond of.

Sorry if this is the most boring post ever. Is anyone interested in boots? And very interesting that I think this post could have been one of my longest posts ever.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

dreary days

Woke up this morning at 6:30. It has been so gross out lately. It's a little too cold too fast for me. It's brutally windy out there and we don't yet feel like we should be grabbing a jacket on the way out, but we should. And the rain, it's been raining on and off for over a week. Things have been a little slow at the restaurant and that compared with this weather is making me a little sad. I have just wanted to cuddle up on the couch with a blanket. Well, surprisingly my 2 kids aren't really into that plan. We have to get up and do stuff and play and go to dance class in the pouring rain and blah blah blah. I have got them to cuddle up a tiny bit with some tv watching the past few days and I'm feeling a little guilty about that. Sure, let's watch a movie. Last night we watched Glee. I used to be on a strict no tv all day or at the most one Nick Jr. show (20 minutes).

So, I feel like I've been slacking. When we woke up this morning (and it was still dark out) I decided no tv today. I will be a good parent. It is now 8:30. So far we played with play doh, had breakfast and played with crayons and stickers. Can I make it the whole day? I'm a little tired already (need coffee). There is no school today. I think we need to get out of the house, even though it's pouring out AGAIN!

I'll show you some of my lovely farmers market food pics to think of nicer days.