Friday, February 18, 2011

Wow, it's been awhile. Let's see, well first I wasn't blogging because I was pregnant. And I didn't want to tell the worldwideweb until 12 weeks. And then I reached 12 weeks and I was forming in my mind how to write the post. It happenned on that weekend away in Boston, how romantic, or how careless, or whatever.

And then the day I was going to post I had a miscarriage. A sort of messy, sort of traumatic not fun at all miscarriage. And then the whole week after that I was such a total mess it is not even funny. And then another week went by.

And now I'm here. I'm in a place where I'm feeling okay. If I can't have a baby I want to accomplish things. So I'm working and rearranging rooms. I'm trying to kick a*s at this jewelry business. Trying to book shows, and sell online. It's fun and rewarding and it's nice to have something to throw myself into. And of course there are those 2 littles ones that take up my time too. We had just told our 5 year old she would be a big sister again when it happened. So that was a bummer.

The last time I had a miscarriage I threw myself into getting pregnant again. I was determined, I bought ovulation kits and it was my goal to get pregnant as quickly as possible, and I did. I got pregnant with Ella about 5 or 6 weeks after my miscarriage. And it actually feels good this time to throw myself into something other than that. It will happen, we're just going to take our time this time around.