As always, my life is feeling like a whirlwind. The days pass so quickly, so much seems to get done and not get done. And, I am exhausted.

Knitting is going well, I'm almost done with my second scarf. It is taking longer that I thought and I decided to make a hat next. I'm a little nervous about the circular knitting so someone suggested I crochet. It seems complicated, but probably just because I'm used to knitting. So, I'll get there. I just have this lovely vision of the 4 of us wearing hats I made. Believe it or not, this seems like a very impressive feat.

I used to take Samantha to a weekly playgroup where for the first hour everyone played and for the second hour people watched the kids for you while you sit in a group setting with a counselor. It is at times very cheesy and wierd but sometimes it was great. When I was potty training Samantha it was great to talk about my frustrations or hear tips from other people. Sometimes the group facilitator, who I guess is a licensed "life coach", can you be a licensed life coach, I'm not sure?, can be quirky. When nobody has a big issue to discuss she will make us go around the room and say what is wonderful about us. I've done this so many times in the last 4 years that I'm so over it and can't help rolling my eyes like a teenager when she brings it up. That will lead her to say, "and why does this make you so uncomfortable..."

Anyway, I'm not painting a pretty picture. It is a great place to go because you have something to do, you know at least a few of your friends will be there, and it can be fun. I went this week with just Ella for the first time in about 6 months. It was actually nice, we did have to say what was wonderful, but I'm so used to that by now, it's no big deal. I said it was wonderful that I go to a organized exercise class once a week because I'm taking time for me, even if that is all I do some weeks, at least I know I'm doing something. I also told them I started a blog. Only 2 people know about my blog in real life (husband and 1 friend). It was like I was sharing a little secret about myself. It was fun, and they all thought it was a great idea. They all might be googling me now, if they care that much. Number 1, I don't think I'm easily traceable and Number 2, my secrets aren't all that juicy that I need to hide them. I just do like knowing that family and all friends aren't reading my blog. What about you? Does everyone know about your blog? My old blog, I used to email out to remind people to read every so often, so all my friends and family read it. For this point in my life, I prefer it this way.

Someone Else's Giveaway

I want to win a coat from Beth at I Should Be Folding Laundry and you probably do too. Go here to see her post.

She is giving away a awesome Lands End coat for kids. It looks very warm and cozy. If I won, I would pick pink because my daughter will only wear pink if she can help it. what about you?

1 Year!

We had our one year anniversary last week. We have owned a restaurant for one year! That seems like a pretty good success, right? Things are not perfect by any means. But, the first 2 years of owning a restaurant are the hardest and at 1 year, we are doing well. That seems like something to be proud of.

We had a party for our staff last Sunday. It was so so great. Many of us are pretty good friends. Of course, we're the bosses (my husband and I). So besides our manager (who we met in college) and my brother, there is a line there. Some we're closer with than others, as always. I had visions of our party being a bonding experience.

We invited everyone to our home. We had it catered, for once we were not cooking. Most of the people who worked for us were there. We have 2 teenagers who work for us, a 20 year old and a mix of people in there 20's and early 30's. So it was interested to have everyone over together to hang out. I was given a copy of this karaoke singstar game. I asked the 16 year old who works for me to bring his playstation over (how hilarious is that?). I wasn't sure how it was going to go down. I said, we're going to karaoke, haha. Everyone laughed and said, yeah, right. Well, we broke out the game and it was perfect. Everyone sang, the good, the bad, the younger, the older. It was hilarious. We laughed. The only people who didn't sing were the 16 year old who brought his playstation over and the Mexican cook who can't read much English. I would love to know what was going through their heads. They were both smiling, laughing and just watching from the back.

I like to think we bonded, we definitely had fun. Some of us were very good singers, I was one of the worst. But it didn't matter. My song came on. "Every Rose Has It's Thorn" And I rocked it anyway. Fun times.

Now I'm off to make my Christmas lists.

What I Wore...

... To Work Tonight
I've been reading Girls Gone Child who is asking people to post what they wore. I am pretty bad at taking pictures of myself, but it was my first time. I also need another room of the house. Obviously, I took these pics in my playroom.
I am wearing:
dress: Papillon Blanc
tights: Express
purple watch: unknown
boots: Vintage Fryes from 1970's

These are my favorite boots. I forgot to wear the bracelets I wanted to wear with this, next time...
by the way, omg, who doesn't clean up before taking pics that they put on the internet. I apologize. In my defense, I had just gotten off work and I am exhausted, I just really wanted to get this post up. Next time, clean room, I promise.

More Parenting Woes

Sometimes my about to be 5 year old can be just so annoying to her younger sister. This is especially happening at bedtime. Both Samantha and I read to Ella together, then we sing to her. Then we kiss her good night. Lately Samantha can be so annoying at that time. She will be pulling on the book from her sister. Saying the words ahead of time. Tonight she kept putting her foot on the book. It's like she's doing it just to be annoying and difficult. I feel badly for being a little tough on her. But, this is supposed to be a nice, quiet wind down time and Samantha can make it so difficult. It's amazing that someone can be so sweet sometimes and just so terrible other times with her sister. I guess that is sisterhood.

An update on Ella's bedtime. Tonight I have walked her back to bed 3 times so far. Last night she woke up and we let her in out bed. Today someone suggested a gate in the doorway and just tell her she has to stay in her room. This seems a little harsh to me for someone her age. Tim agrees and thinks that is not a option for us. I guess I'm just hoping she will grow out of it.

This morning I told Samantha she should put on her tights herself (I was in the shower at the time). She looked at me and said, "you're a bad mom." So many thoughts went through my
head at that moment, I wasn't sure what to say.
Number 1, she has no idea what a bad mom is.
Number 2, I think she might be a tough teenager.
Number 3, hmm..so many ways I could go here.

I decided to tell her that I was not, in fact a bad mom. That really hurts my feelings to have her say that. Bad moms don't feed, clothe, or take their children to school. She just looked at me and said, okay, you're a good mommy.

Lately a lot I feel on the brink of being too harsh with her. I just feel like she is at this critical age where lessons need to be taught. She'll either learn or become a big brat. She needs to know what is appropriate to say to people, and as her mother I should be teaching her. Right?

I'm not sure if I've mentioned it here yet but Tim and I are going away for 2 nights at the end of the month, this is seriously needed. We went away for a very short one night last February, left at night and returned at 8 AM the next day. Before that, it had been before Ella was born. So, this is needed, maybe I'll have more patience afterwards. I can just keep picturing those 2 nights when I start to get frustrated.

Bedtime Woes

I woke up a few night ago and felt something warm and cuddly next to me. I instinctively curled up next to her. Then I awoke. "Tim?", I whispered. "Did you go get Ella?"
"No, did you?" "Nope."
My just turned 2 year old and just started sleeping in her own bed, was now coming to my bed in the middle of the night.
Samantha will be five next month, she still yells for us when she wakes. She does not get out of bed on her own. My little baby Ella is getting out of bed on her own. What's even more strange to me is that she's not even waking me at all. Just climbing into bed and going to sleep.

I have mixed feelings on this. On one hand, she is very cute and cuddly and I don't mind sleeping with her at all. I mind it even less when she's not even waking me up to do it. So sweet... But.... I don't want my kid to sleep with me nightly. That's never really been my thing. I like my space at night. So, what to do? Wait it out? Put her back in the crib? She's too old to let cry at night. I'm not sure. I guess for now we wait.

I need to post, I know. For now I will give you the obligatory Halloween picture. enjoy!